Dazed and Confused

I am so lost these days. I just can't figure out how I should feel and how I really do feel. Everything is all jumbled up in my head. I am a very trusting and caring type of person, maybe that's a bad thing but I really can't be anything else. I know that J has done some things that no one should ever do and I know that he took advantage of having my card. However, I don't in any way believe that he purposely was out to do that to me. I don't think he really meant to hurt me in any way. In fact I'm not really sure he realized how much money he was spending. I already know that he is not the greatest with finances or he wouldn't have needed any of this anyway. I also know that I really do not want to hassle with anything legal I would almost rather be out all that money than to deal with the legal issues. I do believe that he will pay me and I want to work out a plan for him to make all of the credit card payments so that everything can be taken care of civilly. I don't want to get him in more trouble. I still have strong feelings for him. I want to be able to talk to him face to face and work everything out so we can take care of this. I don't really know if I want a relationship with him now or not but I hope that we may be able to at least work things out enough that we can talk to each other and not feel like we hate each other. I don't hate him and I have already forgiven him and I hope that he will forgive me for some of the things that I said to him. We did talk a bit today online and I think we were able to be honest with each other. That's the biggest thing to me. If I had known more of what was going on and the things he was paying off and all of that then it wouldn't have been such an issue because I would have trusted more in the fact that he would pay off the debt. He has opened up so much more with me in the last week than I think he ever did in the month we were dating. I just want to see what we can do without involving legal issues. If he can make a commitment to me and rework the contract that we signed then I will call my credit card company and tell them that we will be paying off the debt rather than putting it through all the fraud stuff.