Again...

Is love really enough? Is this going to keep happening? 3 times in the 2 1/2 years we have been together is a lot. I don't know how to prevent this type of thing from happening again. I know I love him with all my heart. I know that it is true love. I know that I want to be married to him for the rest of my life, but is all of that enough? It scares me to think that one day it really will be over. It was bad enough to make him put a hold on our marriage license with the county clerks office. That's a pretty extreme step to take if you want to make it work. Is this the last time we will have a fight, I doubt it. I hope however that it will be the last time it goes to the extreme. I don't think I can handle it happening again. I don't want to go around in circles. Even though every time it has gone to the extreme it has been over something completely different than before I don't know that we are really making progress. I thought we had gone through this for the last time the last time it happened. Obviously I was wrong. I just want to know how to make it so this was the last time. I have this fear that we are going to come down to throwing out threats of breaking up until finally one of us just does it.


I DO love him with all of my heart. A new song by Rascal Flatts sums it up pretty well:


The Way

Think about the way the earth revolves around the sun.
Gravity holds it all in place
and keeps it all from coming undone.
That's the way, that's the way I feel about you.


Think about how a baby cries to feel his mother's touch
and how he finally wrestled peacefully
when she finally picked him up.
That's the way, that's the way I feel about you.


Oh they say the sky's the limit
but I say there's so much more
'cause your love takes me higher than I've ever been before.
Well the heaven's hold the stars
that's why they stay where they are.
I know why they shine the way they do.
That's the way, that's the way I feel about you.


Just like a soldier fights for what he knows is right
he'd gladly give his last breath for freedom
and he wouldn't even think twice.
That's the way, that's the way I feel about you.


Oh they say the sky's the limit
but I say there's so much more
'cause your love takes me higher than I've ever been before.
Well the heaven's hold the stars
that's why they stay where they are.
I know why they shine the way they do.
That's the way, that's the way I feel about you.


Well I may not be a wise man
but I know one thing is true
that the river's only reason
is to find the ocean blue.
That's the way, that's the way I feel about you.
That's the way, that's the way I feel about you.