What is love really?
This seems to be a recurring question. I don't really know if you can describe it and how do you really know if you're "In Love"? There is a difference between loving someone and being "In Love" with someone. Like, I know I love my parents and my kids and my friends and yes even my ex-husband, but I do not really know if I was ever really "In Love" with my ex-husband. When you spend that much time with a person and they are the father of your children you don't really have a choice. I find myself knowing that I am definitely "In Lust" with "J" but I just can't really say if I am "In Love". But really what is the difference? Does anyone really know? If you do, please clue me in. I know that I want to be with him and want to be able to share every part of my life with him and want him to share every part of his life with me but is that all there is to it or is there more? Sometimes I think I really want to spend every waking moment with him but it's only been a month, is that too soon? But then again, life is short why waste time? But am I wasting time? These are all questions that I ponder continually. I'm not saying that I want to jump in to a marriage because I'm way far off from that. I almost wonder though why not live together. We already have sex so that's no change. Why not start that part of the relationship so we can decide whether or not we can really stand each other that much. Some people say that is a big step but I really wonder whether it is or not. Again, I think, life is short, if you don't waste time and just get past all of the middle stuff then you can know "do I want to spend the rest of my life with this person?" and if not then you can cut it out quicker and move on.
posted by bccw123 at
2:30 PM
1 Comments:
I tend to agree with you, my only words of rebuttal to your inquisitions follow: Do you honestly feel that you would be doing justice to yourself AND your relationship by asking/allowing J to move in with you. Secondly, Do you want him there for more than just companionship and as a cure for lonliness? Lastly I leave you with this thought...
This is an important, serious and difficult question to answer. Friendship and courtship make it possible for two people to become thoroughly acquainted with each other, and to intelligently decide whether they can AND do love each other, and whether it would be wise for them to marry. People who fondle each other are not usually able to discriminate between a heart beat of love and a sex thrill of pleasure. Sensual desire is love's enemy. The two can not thrive together. If sensual desire dominates, love will be destroyed and you both will be stranded. Personal familiarities are a blight to courtship, cause unwise marriages and often end in divorce. If making out and premarital sex could be eliminated from society, fewer mistakes would be made in the choice of a companion and the divorce mill would cease to grind. I just really want you to be sure of what it is that you 'think' your getting into and ultimately, I want to see you follow your heart, have no regrets, grab life by the titties and throw it to the mat until it cries 'uncle fucker'. I wish you the best in whatever you decide!
-Jizr
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